Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Pantsless

I went to the mall last night to buy a pair of pants.

After much frustration, I came home with 5 pairs of underwear, 3 pairs of socks, two books and a yoga for dummies DVD.

No pants.

On the bus on the way home yesterday (before going to the mall) I read this post by Crazy Aunt Purl, as well as a good portion of the 325 comments. She talks about struggling with a bajillion different diets and methods of losing weight, all guaranteed to work...yeah. It struck a chord with me. According to those BMI thingys I am obese. I don't look obese (unless I'm naked in my bathroom), but I certainly am overweight, and the last doctor's visit revealed cholesterol that's a titch too high. I've had pressure from family members for years to lose weight, and I've put pressure on myself. When I started university I was a curvy 125 lbs and was dancing 6 days a week. In my head I'm still 125 lbs so it's often a shock to me to catch sight of myself in a reflective surface. But I've been resistant and resentful and stubborn, and I haven't used all the tools I know about because "losing weight" is hard. Reading CAP's musings and the comments of all those people who have been struggling with similar stuff felt really, really good. 'Cause it's not just me.

So when I couldn't find pants that fit me properly I picked up YOU: On a Diet by Drs. Roizen and Oz (and a book of erotica, but that's neither here nor there), and a yoga DVD. The quitting smoking is sticking, so it's time to throw the next part of my loving of me at the wall and wait for it to stick too.

Today I will start not dieting. Today, I will start being more mindful.

6 comments:

Helen said...

Go Podgy, go Podgy! *makes the stirring dance motion*

Is that the Yoga for Dummies one with the yellow/black front, part of the "For Dummies" range of DVDs and books? It has a lady called Sarah doing it?

I've got that one too!

I need to get back on the exercise bandwagon. I did Tae Bo one week, and because a work guy gave me a lift home, I was home 90 minutes earlier than normal - in dayligt as well! - so I went for a run. Ended up at 0.7 miles, but I haven't been running in months (bar 2 or 3 random runs about a month ago). And the time was still good, despite me almost getting frost bite.

Maybe your yoga exercise will make me do yoga more. There - you'll have someone following you, so you can't quit!

I *might* even try doing it in a morning, which will mean getting up earlier [wibble]

Amanda said...

I'm scared of trying to my fullest, because I'm scared it won't work. As it is, if I fail, I can comfort myself with the hope that if I had really tried, I wouldn't have failed.

allison said...

The mindfulness is a great way to go. That, and finding wonderful things to eat that are good for you. I am hoping to start up Pilates again soon. G is supposed to get me a guest pass for the Y VERY SOON (do you think he heard me?)so I can try out their classes before deciding to join. They have 2-3 classes that fit really well into my schedule. I desperately need to start exercising because constant, on-going denial is just not as fun as it once was.

Lolly said...

Yay for health!

How do you like the Yoga for Dummies book? I might have to check it out.





(I've decided there are too many 'Laurie's on blogger and I'm switching to 'Lolly'.) ~ mouse

Jenn said...

Let me know if you ever want a phone chat about this because, sister, I hear what you are saying!

laurie said...

According to my BMI, I am obese, too.

I think it all comes down to fear. What do I fear that is keeping me attached to my overeating? I loved my overeating because it numbed me from life.

It's never ever about food. We know what to do (eat less, move more!) but I never did that. Why? Because i had fear, and food was my comfort and safe place.

God, this stuff is hard.